Cruising has its Challenges

Nassau was hot, hot, hot

Last week Bob and I celebrated our 37th anniversary.  He surprised me with a weekend cruise to the Bahamas.  We had a wonderful time together, just the two of us (if you don’t include the other 2,598 people).

Having been on a few cruises, we are now part of the Platinum Class.  I know that sounds impressive, but let me assure you, we put on our swim suits one leg at a time like the rest of you.  Just as I was getting all puffed up about my privileged status, I discovered that Platinum Class is the bottom rung of an elaborate cruising class system.  We have a long, long way to go to get to the top, but we can get there by taking more and more cruises.  It’s vicious; i.e., expensive.  Here’s the progression:  Above us lowly Platinum people are many classes – Silver, Gold, Diamond, Rock, Paper, Scissors.  Gold is better than silver.  Diamond is better still.  Rock crushes Scissors.  Paper covers Rock.  Scissors cuts Paper.  It’s all very complicated.

Getting back to our weekend, we arrived at the port and I went through security without any problems.  Bob, however, had his hat frisked.  I’m guessing something about it threw up a flag that implied he was a risky cruiser.  After being patted down, it was reunited with Bob and allowed through.

We boarded the lovely Monarch of the Seas, looking forward to our adventure.  We didn’t care what type of room we had since this was a short trip.  Even with that in mind, when we opened the door to our cabin, we discovered the smallest room I had ever seen.  We called it our statecloset.  I’m not saying it was small, but we had to go out in the hall just to change our mind.  On the positive side, Bob and I were closer than ever.

Before I go on, let me tell you that our ship was completely booked with 2600 passengers.   With that number of people in mind, you’d expect to find a few swimming pools and multiple hot tubs.  There was two of each.  They were open beginning at 4 pm on Friday until midnight that night and then from 9:00 am until midnight on Saturday and Sunday.  But using the hot tubs was tricky.  The maximum number of people in each was ten.  Have you ever tried cycling 2600 people through two hot tubs ten people at a time?  That’s quite a challenge!

Challenge accepted!  I put my math prowess to work to solve the problem.  I figured 20 percent of the people don’t care about going in the hot tub and that leaves 2,080 people in line to use 2 hot tubs with a capacity of 10 people each.  If each round in a hot tub lasts 15 minutes and I’m at the end of the line, at what time do I get a turn?

Yes, these are the things that keep me up at night.  I lie there laughing as I picture hundreds of people circling the ship while waiting in line to finally have a soak.  So here’s the deal, the first person to give me the correct answer to my question as a comment at the end of this post will win a $5 Starbucks gift card.  That’s right – Five Whole Dollars!  You already know that I don’t excel at math, so of course I’ll have Bob check the answer for me.  I’ll announce the winner in my next post.  And as a bonus, I promise not to give you any more math problems, no matter how funny I think they are.

You Do Not Need a Calculator to Read This Post

Thanks for stopping in at my new blog.  I’m happy you are here and very excited about my new look.  It is appropriate that my first post involves my sweet husband.  Bob is truly a gift from God for me.  He supports me in everything I do.  He even reads my posts before they go out just to keep me out of trouble.

Bob also is responsible for checking any and all math in this blog.  Let me explain.  Ours is the perfect marriage – Bob is the math/science/computer/handy-man guy and I am good at English.  I know that seems a little lopsided; but let’s face it, if we could not diagram all the sentences that we speak and spell words correctly, math, science and all that other stuff would be useless!

Tissues come in handy when I’m doing math.

So just in time for the start of my new blog, I had a math incident with Bob.  I was writing my “About Me” page and thought it would be entertaining to throw in a math problem.  I was looking for originality and I had not seen that done in any of the blogs that I follow.  Besides, I feel an obligation to help my readers keep those mental faculties sharp.  I chose an algebra problem – that was my first mistake.

As a little background, when I was homeschooling my sons, Bob believed that I could successfully teach them algebra.  Bob was wrong, but he so believed in me that it took an act of God to convince him otherwise.  At first Bob tried working with me to prepare me to teach our sons.  My son, Joe, thankfully was spared by virtue of the fact that he was happy to teach himself.  But that left poor Scott.  Thankfully he is math-minded and I don’t think I did any permanent damage to him; but in the process, I was going out of what was left of my mind.  I would often email math problems to Bob at work so that he could talk Scott through the problems.  I enlisted Joe to help, too.  Thankfully Bob wound up getting pneumonia and was forced to be at home observing first hand my feeble efforts to teach algebra.  God is so good – he even used pneumonia for the good of our family.  Bob became the new algebra teacher.

Back to my “About Me” page.  I asked Bob if I had the algebra problem right.  I did not.  He told me I needed another equation or variable or something else – honestly I started glazing over at this point and went for a walk.  Eventually Bob found me, got out the ladder and patiently talked me off of the roof.   I’m still not sure that I have the math problem right, but Bob assures me that I do so that’s good enough for me.

I lost about an hour of my life over that stupid problem, so I hope you’ll click on over there and laugh yourself silly.  I probably should have helped people sharpen their brains by having them diagram a sentence; but that seemed more challenging than a math problem, given the limitations of having to use a keyboard.  Come to think of it, I could have asked Bob to design a new, sentence-diagramming-friendly keyboard.  That would have taken less time.