Things My Husband Shouldn’t Say to Me

Sunday was a beautiful day – the perfect day for my husband to take a well-deserved rest by the pool. (We live in Florida.) I was happy watching him soak up the sun while reading a book. Well, I was happy until he came in. Let me recount our conversation for you.

Bob looking in the mirror at his chest after spending two hours by the pool – “Oh, I guess I did get a little sun out there today.”

Me, realizing I have to go to the dermatologist on Tuesday for my semi-annual humiliation, I mean skin check – “You are a little red. You need to be careful.”

Bob – “Don’t worry. It’ll be brown in a day. I think it’s already turning brown.”

Me throwing my hands up in frustration – “Brag, brag, brag! Do you know how long it would take me to go from red to brown? Hum? Or to get anything that resembles a tan? No, of course you don’t. Nobody knows! It’s like the mystery of how many licks it takes to get to the Tootsie roll center of a Tootsie pop.”

End scene.

Say, “bees!”

Just so you know, today I did go to the dermatologist and it was a very good day for this pasty-white girl. A good day means 21 freezes of pre-skin-cancer areas and 1 small biopsy. Boom!

This is what I looked like afterwards. Warning, no make-up. Now you, Bob, and my dermatologist are the only ones who get to see me like this. Feel privileged and always use a good sunscreen of 50 SPF or above. If they had that when I was a kid maybe I wouldn’t come out of the dermatologist’s office every six months looking like I was attacked by a swarm of bees.





This is Post #3 of the April Ultimate Blog Challenge.

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  1. Oh, Bonnie! You’re so right that using sunscreen is important! Thanks for sharing in a way that makes an impact.

    Rob regularly points to his forehead (the area has grown considerably as his hair disappears. LOL) and remarks with similar words, “I guess I got some sun, eh?” And I reply, “Wear a hat!”

  2. It seems wrong to “like” this post. I don’t like the semi-annual “humiliation” you have to go through, but yay for a good check-up!

  3. Leslie

     /  April 3, 2019

    Or maybe if you had not used SPF 0 baby oil as a young teen.. my dermatology appt is in two weeks. 🦀🌞🌊😊

    • Leslie

       /  April 3, 2019

      After reading all the other comments, this looks rather nasty. I hope you know it was not meant that way at all — just a painful memory of a long ride home doused with glycerin. The stupid thing things we do as kids that we pay for years later.

      • No offense at all! You know the young and stupid me like few of my readers do. We have painful memories of Ocean City, MD. I hope your check-up goes well.

  4. My sympathies. Wishes for quick healing.

    • Thank you so much. I’ve had several basal cell carcinomas removed over the years – the price for being very fair-skinned and not understanding the harmful effects of the sun when I was young. Plus the only thing available then was Coppertone suntan lotion. We’ve come a long way. My doctor is super careful with me and thinks the one biopsy is going to be negative. Now I don’t go out without SPF 50 or above. Living in Florida – it truly is the Sunshine State.

  5. Funny! Glad you have a sense of humor and are proactive.

  6. Sunscreen is important. Even in January, if I step foot in Florida (I’m an upstate NY gal), it’s with SPF50 slathered all over me. They don’t make sunshine the way it used to be, alas.

    • You’re not kidding. I wish I had used sunscreen on my hands earlier because they take a daily beating while driving. Thanks for the comment.

  7. Oh, Bonnie, you are too funny! I too am one of those olive complexion types who get really tan (or used to anyway) Thank you for making me chuckle and I’m glad you take such diligent care of yourself.

  8. Mary Owens

     /  April 10, 2019

    I know that what you’re going through is dangerous but what you said to him made me laugh out loud.

    • Thanks, Mary. Our sense of humor is in tact. I had my first skin cancer 12 years ago, thankfully basal cell. I’ve had three more. I keep a close watch on my skin. I appreciate your stopping by.

  9. Thank you for spreading the word Bonnie I wish you well…Thank you for the follow 🙂


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