The Importance of Friends

I am finding it more and more challenging to uncover the lighter side of life these days, but that only makes me more determined. My mind has become a bit numb. I would wear a hat to warm it up and maybe get the blood circulating, but that is problematic for me due to the size of my head (plus, I don’t think it works that way). I used to be sensitive about my extra-large noggin, then I discovered that my friend, Moggie, has what she considers a small head. For entertainment we would go try on hats together. The hat that sat way on top of my head would slide down to her nose.

I have convinced myself that when you look at me you are not thinking, “wow, she has a huge head.” If Moggie and I stand next to each other, you wouldn’t be thinking about our heads. You would likely notice that I look like a giant next to her, but that’s okay. We have learned that the size of our heads or height of our bodies does not define us. We large headed folks can mingle with small headers quite nicely. That’s called diversity.

Moggie stopped by our house spur of the moment the other day. It was like medicine for my soul to see my friend.

There have been times, which had nothing to do with a pandemic or social distance mandate or masks, when I felt isolated in my life. One of those times was when Bob and I first moved to Orlando from Maryland back in the 70s. We were young and knew no one outside of my family. We had begun attending a mega church and that was not proving a successful means to friendship building. So many people and no new friends! It was a bit overwhelming for us.

We prayed that God would give us friends.

One night we bravely attended a church class for young married people. Since it was smaller in number, we thought we’d meet people. Alas, they all seemed very friendly – with each other. Little did we know that God had something different in mind. After our meeting was over, we were going to the main service, so we wandered out to the hall with another couple who were also first-timers. We sat together in the meeting and introduced ourselves. I remember whispering to Bob that maybe we could invite them over, but before we could act on that, they passed us a note with their address on it and a friendship was born.

That was over forty years ago. Since that time God has brought many more amazing friends into my life. Recently I have been attempting to refocus on friendships. It has been far too easy to live life isolated from the relationships God has blessed us with. I want to encourage you, in whatever state of pandemic safety you find yourself in, reach out to those you love. Friends are a gift – it’s important that they are present in your life.

I’ll leave you with this, if someone thought it important enough that their pets have friends, how much more should we humans cherish our friends.

According to the report, this was to fill the need of dogs feeling isolated during the pandemic. Wow!

Six Degrees of Coronavirus?

 

Glad I stocked up before flu season hit!

The last week of January, Bob went to Oregon on business. We had begun to hear rumblings about the Coronavirus, but I was only mildly alerted regarding Bob’s trip. I reminded him to take hand sanitizer (which was in abundance at that time) and asked him to steer clear of anybody who may have traveled to China.

By mid-March, I was mentally exhausted from the reporting of this horrible virus. Little did I know that we’d only just begun.

We were expecting a visit from my sister from Washington State on March 11. A week earlier, northwestern Washington had become an epicenter of outbreak; and my sister was debating the wisdom of making the trip, which was to celebrate our mother’s 92nd birthday. Since she lives in northeastern Washington, we agreed she should come. By the time she landed in Orlando on the 11th, Kirkland, Washington, was all over the news.

As you can imagine, that put some stress on our visit.

The next day our other sister arrived from Georgia – thankfully an easy drive for her. We determined to and did enjoy the celebration, but there was a Corona cloud over our time together. It hung over us like humidity on a summer night. Thick and icky. We quickly began to realize that we were at the beginning of new daily and hourly updates of how our country was weathering this invasion.

It certainly has made me think twice about using the word “viral.” Nobody wants to go viral now.

In less than a week we went from hand washing tutorials to the new term “social distancing.” And the socially safe distance changed in that time as well – from no gatherings over 100 to 50 to 10 to just stay home. It was head spinning. We began to wonder if my sister and her husband would even be able to fly home. And the underlying question on everyone’s mind – is their enough toilet paper to go around?

So surreal! When my family returned to their own homes on March 18, we all breathed a sigh of relief. When things are falling apart, there’s no place like home.

Now we are looking at six feet of separation as a bare minimum and more likely being homebound (sheltering in place) as our country comes together to fight this awful thing.

But, as you maybe can imagine if you’ve been following me for a while, funny things started stirring in my mind. Things that could be funny about this but weren’t funny yet. Distance – time not social – allows the funny to seep into our life again.

For instance, I was talking to Bob last week and told him it looked to me like the cases of COVID-19 were increasing exponentially.

Bob – “Exponentially! That’s a math term.”

Me feeling proud – “I know.”

Bob – “I don’t think it’s truly going up exponentially. What exponent are you using?”

Me – “Two. I thought I could handle that one.”

Bob – silence

Me – “I hear the cases of COVID-19 are rising steadily.”

Also, did you know that going stir crazy refers to being in prison? Stir is a slang word for prison. Maybe you think you’re going stir crazy, but unless you are in prison, what you may be experiencing is cabin fever, which does not involve a literal fever. So, don’t sweat it. Remember, if you’re breaking out in a sweat, then your fever is likely breaking. Also, you don’t have to live in a cabin to have cabin fever. You can have condo fever, mansion fever, apartment fever, or even split-level ranch fever. It’s all the same. It knows no social difference – all it knows is it wants out.

So, I imagine our new normal is like yours. We are careful about everything. My 92-year-old mom lives with us, so nobody comes in our house. I spray the mail down with Lysol, for crying out loud! And you know what? That is funny. Picture me standing in the garage by the trash can sorting, spraying, tossing, and then washing my hands vigorously while singing Happy Birthday. All because I got the mail. Out of the box at the end of my driveway. Yep, that’s what it’s come to.

Then I thought about Six Degrees of Kevin Bacon (the party game based on the theory that any two people on earth are no more than six acquaintances apart). That’s when I realized that I could not separate my thoughts from the Coronavirus by six degrees. If I got to two that was an accomplishment.

I conducted an experiment where I would not talk at the dinner table regarding anything connected with the virus. It was a quiet night. I guess I should have told Bob what I was doing, because it was the quietest five minutes we’ve ever had at the table. No – it doesn’t take me only five minutes to eat. Yes – that’s about how long I lasted before I gave up. And yes again – I think Bob enjoyed the silence – however brief.

I discovered I couldn’t talk about the following:

  1. My grandkids in NC. They are being home schooled now because …
  2. Our son in MI. He is teaching remotely from home because …
  3. Our local grandsons. We can’t get together with them because …
  4. Our weekly church meetings are now on Facebook Live because …
  5. You can only buy one thing of paper or cleaning products because …
  6. The Lake Apopka Wildlife Drive (aka birding drive). We can’t go – it’s closed because …
  7. Going to a restaurant. I’m not sure I want to go where people are because … and then the restaurants closed because …
  8. The place where Mom and I get our nails done. We were there the last day it was open. It’s now closed because …
  9. Bob working from home because …
  10. Disney World. Yes, Disney, Universal, and all the theme parks are closed because …

 

So, you see we don’t need six degrees. We don’t even need two! Everything in life right now points back to that stupid virus.

When I told Bob what I was trying to do, we both realized it was futile to try to keep from talking about it. It’s affecting our daily lives and the lives of everyone we know and love. We need to talk and share and cry and laugh and pray. And that’s what we’re doing. That and a lot of reading, puzzles and games, walks, bike rides, and bird watching.

1000 pieces! I joked that this one was saved in case of a pandemic.

We have family members who are job searching, family members who are in medical and financial professions, family who are teachers. We have family who are young and old and in between. We have friends who are becoming grandparents and friends whose parents have passed during this time. It’s okay to talk about how the virus has affected all these things.

But I do want to keep my focus and not let the negative or downright scary dominate my speech. Of course, we need to discuss what the current events are regarding the pandemic, but we really need to think about and speak about more positive things.

Finally, believers, whatever is true, whatever is honorable and worthy of respect, whatever is right and confirmed by God’s word, whatever is pure and wholesome, whatever is lovely and brings peace, whatever is admirable and of good repute; if there is any excellence, if there is anything worthy of praise, think continually on these things [center your mind on them, and implant them in your heart].

Philippians 4:8 (Amplified Bible)

If any of you have family on the front lines and would like me to add them to my prayer list, please let me know. For that matter, any other needs you have are welcomed too. Thanks for reading and may God bless and keep you.

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