All posts in category Family

Is It Still Considered Stalking if You’re a Nice, Harmless Person?

I am just now coming out of the fog that was last weekend – good timing since another weekend is upon me. What on earth did I do last weekend that was so consuming? Glad you asked.

We moved my father-in-law within his assisted living facility (ALF). This required my sister-in-law flying in from Oregon for four days. She had the job of relabeling all of his clothing and linens with his new room number plus various other organizational activities. In addition, my husband, my son and two other men from our church joined together to do the heavy lifting and toting all of his belongings down the hall and around the corner from his old, north-facing room to his new, east-facing room. This is more important than you might think due to the fact that he is legally blind and sunlight is such a treat for him.

Now you are probably asking what that has to do with stalking. Was I stalking some elderly person in the ALF? Uh, no, of course not. Who would do such a thing?

And, why wasn’t I helping out with the move? Because I had the day off. This was a gift I suggested for myself several times until Bob offered that he thought I might need a little time off from serving his dad. Great idea! And, it’s a good thing, too, or else I would not have had time to go stalking my favorite celebrity. Okay, stay with me and I’ll tell you the story.

I have a dear friend who lives in Seattle who was considerate enough to visit Orlando and stay at a resort near Sea World last weekend. This was pivotal to my impromptu plan. I was scheduled to pick up Margot in the early afternoon on Saturday. We planned lunch and a little light shopping.

Before heading out, I checked my face book and discovered that a friend was at the Ritz day spa in that area and she had an encounter with Paul McCartney. (Thank you, face book location services.) He walked past her while she was holding her grandchild and he couldn’t resist reaching out and holding the baby’s hand. That put things in motion for me. I jumped in the car, put on my Beatles 1 CD, cranked up I Want to Hold Your Hand, and headed out.

I asked Margot where she would like to eat and she was pretty open. I asked her if she would like to go to lunch at the Ritz Carlton and stalk Paul McCartney and she was open to that, too. So, off we went.

I’m a bit of a novice at stalking people, but I thought I’d be pretty good at it. After all, I am a mother of four children, so I’m used to trying to observe people when they don’t want to be seen or bothered.

There was a lot of security out front, so we figured we were in the right place. We walked into the lavish lobby, scoped out the place and asked the concierge for the eatery options. We were calm, cool and collected. I’m sure nobody thought twice about two middle age ladies popping into the Ritz for lunch on a day that Paul McCartney was staying there.

Yes, that is a cloth cocktal napkin. Fancy!

Yes, that is a cloth cocktail napkin. Fancy!

As we headed to our seats we noticed a gathering of his entourage and my heart leaped a bit at the thought that I was so close to people who may or may not be close to Paul McCartney later on that day. Does it get any better than that?

Unfortunately, no. That was as close as we came to seeing him. We did enjoy our fifty dollar lunch and I got quite excited by the fact that my Diet Coke came to me all fancied up with a linen cocktail napkin. (So that’s what they mean by putting on the Ritz.)

In conclusion, I didn’t have to help move my father-in-law. I enjoyed a wonderful yet expensive lunch with my friend, Margot. We saw a group of people who may or may not have been part of the McCartney entourage. I drank a fancy Diet Coke on a cloth cocktail napkin. Oh, and I didn’t get arrested for stalking. Sweet.

4 Comments

by Bonnie Anderson on May 24, 2013 • Permalink

Posted in Celebrities, Family, Friendship

Tagged assisted living facility, cloth cocktail napkins, Diet Coke, Paul McCartney, Ritz Carlton

Posted by Bonnie Anderson on May 24, 2013

https://lifeonthelighterside.com/2013/05/24/is-it-still-considered-stalking-if-youre-a-nice-harmless-person/

Once Upon a Time…

This morning I was privileged to attend a short story reading event in my area. As a writer, I think it’s important to take advantage of these kinds of opportunities. It’s valuable to hear from other aspiring authors. This group, I must say, was adorable. They were my grandson and his kindergarten classmates.

Each of the five and six-year olds wrote and illustrated a story and read aloud to a room full of photo-taking parents and grandparents. My heart leaped a bit as I heard my sweet grandson, Manning, reading his story about the trip he and his family made to Lego Land. I was on the edge of my seat the entire time. The story had it all – plot, action, suspense, and very loveable characters. I am so proud of him.

The teacher did an excellent job of coaching the kids, and they all loved sharing. When their story was told, she supplied a bio for each of the authors. She told us their name and where they live – for example, my grandson lives in his house. We also learned what these up-and-comers do in their spare time. This ranged from playing video games to playing outside, but my favorite was one little girl who likes to run around her couch. And, what do these young authors want to be when they grow up? Everything – doctors, lawyers, teachers, soccer players – you name it. My grandson wants to do construction, which fits in perfectly with his love of Legos.

I was a bit surprised that two of the children want to be spies. One of them wants to be a spy and a mailman, which I think has real possibilities of success provided the Post Office is still around twelve years from now.

None of the kids mentioned wanting to be a writer, but I think the seeds have been sown for some of them to do just that. I overheard the couple next to me saying that the girl who said she wants to be either a lawyer or a cake maker really wants to make cakes. The lawyer thing she added to make her dad happy. By the looks on the parents’ faces, these kids are already doing a great job of that. Most of their stories were dedicated to their mom and dad. Only one child hadn’t made up his mind yet about his future – when you’re six, why not keep your options open.

4 Comments

by Bonnie Anderson on May 14, 2013 • Permalink

Posted in Family, Writing

Posted by Bonnie Anderson on May 14, 2013

https://lifeonthelighterside.com/2013/05/14/once-upon-a-time/

Hanging with My Peeps

Before Easter my daughter was wandering around Pinterest and came up with a picture of an Easter version of deviled eggs. I’m not very creative in the cooking department, but I can devil an egg, so I thought to myself – Challenge Accepted!

The eyes are capers and the beaks are carrot. I think they’re pretty cute, but they were not eaten as readily as usual. I guess it was awkward to bite the head off of a chicken as part of the Easter celebration. Although, nobody has a problem biting the ears off of a chocolate bunny. As long as the real meaning of Easter – Christ is Risen from the Dead – is not lost, it’s all okay with me.

My Peeps

16 Comments

by Bonnie Anderson on April 7, 2013 • Permalink

Posted in Family, Holidays

Tagged deviled eggs that look like chicks

Posted by Bonnie Anderson on April 7, 2013

https://lifeonthelighterside.com/2013/04/07/hanging-with-my-peeps/

Beware of the Couch – Part 3 of 3

Wednesday I began telling the history of couches in our family which leads up to an incident that I didn’t want to tell you about my husband. As a reminder, he has insisted that I should tell this story in the hopes that it will help even one person. Today I conclude the story from the point where I realized that things aren’t always as perfect as they seem.

One night about four months into owning this perfect couch, we had a gathering of about 18 people. Bob and I were sitting across from our couch when we noticed it bowing in the middle. The guys flipped it over and, lo and behold, the delivery men had not set the center leg on the thing. The frame had bent and was starting to crack. The furniture store was extremely apologetic and said we could replace it, but that couch was no longer being made so we had to pick out something else. Oh, the agony!

We picked out a couch that was definitely second fiddle to the other one, but we were limited in our choices so we settled. We told ourselves it would do. It didn’t. After less than a year the cushions were wearing and it hurt my back to sit on it. It was the joke of our family how I never sat on my couch. After about five years, my father-in-law had mercy on me and gave us a new couch of my own choosing for Christmas. This, of course, was a mixed blessing because it meant that we could replace our couch (Hooray!) but it also meant that we had to shop (Boo!). Bob and I spent a couple of weeks looking around and eventually agreed on a fabric covered Lazy Boy that reclined on each end. This brings us to present day.

Oh Boy! Oh Lazy Boy!

Even though we no longer have children at home or pets, we had the couch treated for stain resistance. We didn’t want to take any chances.

Our new couch was delivered at 4pm on a lovely Tuesday afternoon. That night Bob and I each poured ourselves a glass of red wine and headed to the family room to watch TV. As he approached the couch, which is a light color (I know, what was I thinking), I felt fear rise up in my heart. “Are you going to sit on the couch with that?” I asked. “I just don’t want anything spilled on it the very first day.”

He gave me a reassuring look, placed his wine on the end table, and had a seat. I guess I should mention at this point that the biggest challenge in my marriage has been stain removal. That may surprise you as marriages are plagued by so many things – financial crisis, health issues, communication problems, child rearing problems – but those issues come and go while spilling things seems to last forever. Now let me state that Bob is a wonderful, caring man. He can fix just about anything and is a good provider, husband and father; but he does tend to spill…kind of a lot.

So this was the most unrelaxing glass of wine I ever had, but we got through it with no incident so I slept well thinking that my new couch had made it through its first night in our home without being spilled upon.

The next morning I smiled as I went out into the living room and saw my beautiful new couch sitting there. I happily headed to the kitchen and poured my coffee. With cup in hand I decided to live dangerously and sit on our new couch for my morning Bible reading. Now, I cannot over emphasize the importance of reading your Bible in the morning, especially when you sit on your new couch, run your hand across the new fabric, and realize that there is something spilled on it – something that looks suspiciously like red wine – something that is in the general vicinity of where your husband sat the night before with a glass of wine.

Remember, this is less than 24 hours since the Lazy Boy guys set it in our living room. I called Bob and cut right to the chase. “Honey, there appears to be something red on the couch cushion. Did you by any chance spill wine on it last night?”

He insisted that he did not.

“Well, something red is on the seat cushion,” I said. “Something that I guess we could not see last night but today in the light of day it is quite evident.”

He still insisted that he didn’t spill any wine, and then he got quiet – very quiet. “I know what it is,” he said. “It’s blood.” He hesitated and continued, “When I was sitting on the couch, being so careful not to spill my wine, I found myself picking at my toes. When I went to bed I noticed that one had been bleeding a little, but I didn’t think it got on anything. I’m so sorry.” He apologized over and over again. I know he felt terrible about it.

Here’s another little tidbit that might round this story out for you. My pet peeve is picking, especially toe picking. Hearing that click, click, click drives me crazy (and that’s not a long drive). So, with that in mind, you can only imagine that Bob really felt badly about the whole thing.

Thankfully, I was rather composed. I can only account that to God’s grace and how it’s hard to get angry at somebody while you are reading the Bible and while they feel so rotten about the incident anyway. I also will admit that I did mention to Bob at that point how I hate toe-picking and the grief it causes. I’m fairly certain that I may have said that more than once, but I didn’t get angry – not too angry anyway. I guess I was in disbelief.

So, I headed to the computer, registered my new couch’s stain removal agreement and immediately called the hotline. They talked me through how to remove the stain. It worked. It even worked the next time Bob got blood on the couch. And, I won’t even mention the day he accidentally kicked a mug of coffee that was on the floor and splashed the contents over the front of the couch (which I also was able to get out). It’s the baptism with fire, or in this case, red wine and coffee.

Now you can see why I didn’t want to tell you this story. But my sweet husband insisted that he was here to serve; and that truly if this story will help one person not pick his toes while sitting on the living room furniture and, therefore, make his wife crazy, it would be worth it. Now that’s a humble man. It’s also a humble man who has agreed that he won’t sit on the couch unless he’s wearing socks, though I don’t expect him to hold to that agreement. We do live in Florida, after all. It doesn’t really matter anyway; I am a pro at stain removal.

6 Comments

by Bonnie Anderson on April 5, 2013 • Permalink

Posted in Faith, Family, marriage, Stuff I Go Through

Tagged Lazy Boy, shopping for a couch, stain removal from fabric

Posted by Bonnie Anderson on April 5, 2013

https://lifeonthelighterside.com/2013/04/05/beware-of-the-couch-part-3-of-3/

Beware of the Couch – Part 2

Yesterday I began telling the history of couches in our family which leads up to an incident that I didn’t want to tell you about my husband. As a reminder, he has insisted that I should tell this story in the hopes that it will help even one person. Today I resume with our need to purchase yet another new couch.

We waited until the furniture was pretty worn out before we decided to replace it. We had turned our living room and family room into one big room and we thought a sectional would be great. The kids were older and the pets were no longer abusing our belongings.

I scoured furniture stores looking for the right piece. After narrowing it down, Bob and I took all four kids, who by then had grown quite a bit, to try our sectional choices on for size. We found the perfect one. It fit all six of us with plenty of elbow room and it was comfortable. Still, I was hesitant to finalize the purchase. I will blame this on my friend, Moggie. Moggie is adventurous in her decor and thinks out of the box. She is one of the most creative people I know and it seems whatever idea she has works for her. I began to ponder – What would Moggie do? Would Moggie settle for a standard issue albeit perfectly sized couch? No, she would make a statement. I decided I would, too.

My statement came in the form of a blue denim couch and oversized chair that I found at a store that was more upscale than I would typically shop. I had the salesman move the items around the store so I could see them next to each other. I labored over the decision while poor Bob just wanted to get on with life and have a sofa he could sit on. Finally, we made the purchase. I was so proud of myself. I made this decision without even asking Moggie to come down to the store to critique it. This represented real growth for me. I had finally arrived – I was thinking out of the box.

The furniture was delivered and I have to say, I hated it. I don’t know what I was thinking. There was seating only for five. The proportion of the furniture was not right for our room. And, the denim look was not for me. To say that I was upset with myself is a gross understatement. I couldn’t sleep. I repeatedly burst into tears. I was a mess. The really sad part was when we went to bed that night – I tossed and turned and lamented this stupid purchase, and I was disturbing Bob; and he had to go to work the next day. So, I left our bedroom to try to let Bob rest, but there was no place to go. All the bedrooms were full of sleeping children and the only place for me was the couch, and it made me cry. How can you rest on something that upsets you so much? The answer is – you cannot. If I remember correctly I found refuge on the floor of our small office with a pillow and a blanket. I felt banned from my own living room.

By the next morning I knew I had to do something. Bob was feeling the same way, only his main concern was for my sanity and the peace of our household. I told him that I wanted to take it back. He left for work and said I could do whatever made me happy, but I should remember we bought it on clearance with no returns allowed and I shouldn’t get my hopes up.

I got in my car and headed for the furniture store only to be assured that the no return policy really does mean just that. Finally I talked to the manager who must have seen my bloodshot eyes and believed that I really was losing sleep over this purchase (or perhaps had other issues he didn’t want to deal with) and he had pity on me and let me make an exchange. I didn’t plan this and was not trying to manipulate the man, but I burst into tears. I told him how grateful I was but there was really no other item in his store that I could picture in my house which I could afford. This kind and I’m sure frustrated man broke the store policy and gave me a full refund. When I got home I called Bob who to this day is still amazed at the success of this feat of desperate determination.

Before I had any more time to think about it, Bob grabbed me by the hand and drove me to the store with the standard issue sectional. We made the purchase and lived happily with it for well over a decade. I decided right there and then that decorating “out of the box” is not a place I should ever consider going. It works for Moggie, but it surely would produce an ulcer in me.

Eventually our perfect sectional wore it out which meant that it was time to shop again. I can assure you that Bob was nervous.

We decided to go leather this time. We quickly found the couch and loveseat that we liked and bought it. It was delivered and everybody was happy. It looked great and was comfortable. We all fit on it. It was perfect and so easy this time. Or so it seemed.

Join me tomorrow as I conclude this story and reveal the “incident” regarding our current couch which my husband has so humbly insisted I share.

14 Comments

by Bonnie Anderson on April 4, 2013 • Permalink

Posted in Family, Friendship, marriage, Stuff I Go Through

Tagged shopping for a new couch

Posted by Bonnie Anderson on April 4, 2013

https://lifeonthelighterside.com/2013/04/04/beware-of-the-couch-part-2/

Beware of the Couch – It Will Mess With You

I like to be open with you, but I have struggled with sharing the following story because it doesn’t put my husband in all too great a light. He asked me if I was going to blog about this incident, but I told him I just couldn’t. His humble answer, “If this will help just one person, it will be worth it. Tell the story.” So, with my dear husband’s permission, here goes.

It was with a mixed bag of emotions that I recently found myself waiting nervously for the delivery of our new couch. Every time I shop for furniture I am filled with a sense of doubt over if I have chosen the right thing, and this never shows up as clearly as when a new couch is on the horizon. Let me take you back to the history of the couch in our family.

Bob and I married in 1975 and like most people who had lived at home until they were married and also married young, we were on the poor side. Our tiny unfurnished apartment loomed large with empty space. Thanks to our parents, though, we did furnish it. It was, shall we say, eclectic. The focal points were his mom’s old sewing table, which we used for dining, and the couch from my parent’s basement. This couch had served our family well – so well that the back legs had long given out and were replaced by Reader’s Digest Condensed Books, which Mom and Dad lovingly included with the couch.

I can only imagine how happy my parents were to unload, I mean give this to us; and we were truly happy to receive it. After two years we had saved enough money for a replacement. We chose one that had legs on all four corners – we were big time. Along with the couch, we purchased a matching love seat.

At that point in our life I worked for the Social Security Administration and Bob was going to school full-time. I had contracted baby fever, a condition that carried the possibility of slowing down Bob’s exit from school with a diploma in hand, so we devised a plan to put a Band-Aid on my condition. We got a puppy.

Blondie was adorable – a little ball of golden fur. We loved having her and hated leaving her each day as we went to work and school. When we left the house we blocked her in the kitchen with a few chew toys and her bed and went about our day. Typically, Bob returned home before I did and I would call him from work when I was getting ready to leave (this was before the days of cell phones, of course). That particular day Bob seemed as normal as ever with not even a hint of trouble in his voice.

If you look closely you can see the corner is chewed up. Blondie is asking if I forgive her yet.

When I walked into our apartment, Bob was bent over the sewing machine with a worried look in his eye. Cute little Blondie had escaped from the kitchen and chewed every cushion, as well as the frame, of our new couch. I think Bob thought I was going to kill her. He may have been right. He was finishing up mending the last cushion as I came in the door. I wish I could tell you it looked as good as new, but it didn’t. The best I can say is – it wasn’t awful.

It took me a while to get over this. I reminded myself that it was just furniture, things, stuff. Stuff that we had saved for two years to buy. Stuff that still had the aroma of new furniture. Stuff that I wanted to bludgeon my dog with. You know, stuff.

Six years later we were moving into a new house and decided it was time to replace the couch. No more bite marks! Hooray. We bought a great couch and matching recliner with durable fabric that would function well with our growing family (two kids, a cat and, amazingly, the same dog). The dog hadn’t chewed anything for years so I was no longer worried about her.

In a matter of a few years we had grown by two more kids and another couple of cats. The cats made their mark on our furniture this time. They looked at our recliner as a scratching post so I traded chew marks for shredded fabric along the back of our chair. By this time, it didn’t bother me as much. I was getting used to things being torn, stained and even puked on. I was becoming an expert at stain removal, which was going to serve my husband well in the future and keep me from strangling him.

Tune in tomorrow when I will resume the story that I didn’t want to tell you about my husband.

10 Comments

by Bonnie Anderson on April 3, 2013 • Permalink

Posted in Family, marriage, Stuff I Go Through

Posted by Bonnie Anderson on April 3, 2013

https://lifeonthelighterside.com/2013/04/03/beware-of-the-couch-it-will-mess-with-you/

Let Your Imagination Go Wild on Valentine’s Day

Ella’s Valentine Note to GW

I remember when my kids were young what a pain in the neck Valentine’s Day was – all those cards, all that candy! It was worse than Halloween or Easter because you added to it the notion of romantic love, which really should not be pushed on any seven-year old. I always preferred to introduce that concept to my kids when they were well into their twenties.

And, speaking of seven-year-olds, our granddaughter Ella has been preparing her Valentine cards. She is a very loving little girl and made sure not to forget anyone. She went down her list – parents, sisters, her brother Jett, Jett’s imaginary friend. Yes, she included them all.

Jett is four. He is badly outnumbered in his house by his three sisters. Thankfully, he has a very special, though imaginary, friend who is a boy. Jett’s friend is a bit different from most of the imaginary friends that I have heard about. Jett’s friend is a blankee; actually he’s more of a persona. His name is Green Wee. We don’t know why.

Green Wee, or GW for short, is so life-like to Jett that he talks about him as if he were real. He told me one day that Green Wee had his cousin visiting him. Jett was happy for him to have company and wasn’t threatened at all by another imaginary friend in the life of GW.
Sometimes GW disappears. (I guess we all need some alone time.) When that happens the entire household is enlisted on a search and rescue. Usually he hasn’t gone too far (after all, he is a blanket). GW closes himself in the bathroom cabinet when he has to “go.” I suppose his waste is akin to lint – he never puddles on the floor.

Bedtime, of course, is when GW is most needed, and he is the only one that can make Jett feel better if he gets a boo-boo. He is one compassionate blankee so I think it is entirely appropriate that Ella sent him a Valentine. It is extra special when you notice that she took the time to make sure that Green Wee knows that Jett loves him.

When I look at Green Wee, I see a well-used blanket or lint in the dryer. In Jett’s imagination he sees a friend. This challenges me to make sure that I’m not treating my loved ones like dryer lint. And I especially don’t want to be a wet blanket to them.

Happy Valentine’s Day!

12 Comments

by Bonnie Anderson on February 13, 2013 • Permalink

Posted in Family, Holidays

Tagged imaginary friends, Valentine's Day

Posted by Bonnie Anderson on February 13, 2013

https://lifeonthelighterside.com/2013/02/13/let-your-imagination-go-wild-on-valentines-day/

At Least the Twitching Has Passed

I am at that point in my life when I thought that things for me would be relatively simple. The kids are all grown. The pets have all died. My husband loves his job. I don’t have to go to work.

But for somebody who has no job or kids to run around, I don’t find myself home alone much. I attribute that to the fact that I am part of the generation that provides the bridge between our own children and grandchildren and our parents. Some call us the sandwich generation. (In my case, it’s a club sandwich.) One of the things that I do is transport my father-in-law to doctor appointments a few times a month or run errands with him. I recently took him to a doctor appointment. It doesn’t sound too complicated – just pick him up from his Assisted Living Facility (ALF) and drive him to the doctor. Right? Wrong! Doctor appointments begin days before the actual date on which they fall. Let me tell you the excruciating tale of the last appointment.

Once upon a time, there was a man named Dale who loved to go to the doctor. (It probably had to do with the fact that it got him out of his apartment.) Dale had an appointment to get an epidural injection for the relief of his back pain. Since he had various health issues that required many medications, this was complicated. He had to go off of certain meds during the week prior to receiving the shot. Dale’s appointment was for a Friday. I was to pick him up at 9:30 that morning. Let’s back up a few days so you can see what went on leading up to that appointment.

Two weeks earlier I gave notice to his nurse of the appointment, along with the doctor’s requirement of him discontinuing his Coumadin a week prior to the shot. We have done this a few times before, so no problem.

Wednesday: I call the ALF to remind them of the appointment on Friday and remind them I will need fresh blood work to take with me at that time (they already have the prescription for it). Problem – there will be no time to get the blood work done on Friday morning, so Thursday afternoon will have to suffice. Fine.

Thursday at 5:15 PM – I get a call from Dale’s nurse saying that somehow he received his Coumadin the night before. She was very apologetic, and I knew it was unusual for a mistake to be made. I call the pain doctor, but of course, it’s after hours. I talk with the answering service; she talks with the doctor; twenty minutes later they agree to allow the injection as long as his blood work looks good. I call the ALF back and report. Oops, the blood work was not done; but they assure me they will get someone in very early the next day so we will be set. By now, I’m actually at the facility picking up Dale to go out and celebrate his 90^th birthday with the family. The family showing is on the light side because five of us have the flu, but the healthy ones still have a nice dinner out to celebrate with him. My favorite quote of the night was when he said, “I’ve waited 90 years for this dinner.”

Celebrating Bob’s father’s 90th birthday at Kobe.

Later that night – Bob (my husband) takes his dad back to the ALF and reminds him that he is not to eat anything after midnight and not to drink anything after 8:00 AM.

Friday at 9:15 AM – I arrive to pick up Dale only to find that the he does not have the blood work results. I rush over to the nurses’ station and inquire. The guy was late to draw the blood. They try to track him down on his cell phone to have him drop the sample off at the closest lab and fax the results to our pain doctor. They get his voice mail. I call the pain doctor who tells me to go ahead and come. They’ll at least examine him and probably receive the results in time to have the injection. I inform them I’ll be ten minutes late. They are gracious.

Friday at 9:50 AM – I’m driving down the road with Dale and we joke about how maybe he’s not supposed to have this shot today after all. Then it occurs to me to ask a question. “Dad, you didn’t eat anything today, did you?” His reply, “Just a half a sandwich at about 7 AM.” I call the pain doctor from my cell phone. By now they know my voice. “Well, he can’t have the shot. We can’t anesthetize him after eating. Unless… I guess he could just get a local if he’s okay with that.” He was. I inform them we will be about 15 minutes late now that we have entered a traffic-jammed construction zone. I start twitching.

Friday at 10:15 AM – We arrive at the office only to find out that, of course, they have not yet received the blood work results. I call the ALF and get their voice mail. The doctor comes in and prescribes a sedative for me (just kidding). Seriously, he could see that I was totally stressed out and he was so kind and patient. He examined my father-in-law and sent us upstairs to await the blood work results.

Friday at 11:15 AM – The results are in – the shot is a “Go.”

On the way home, Dale wants to go shopping or out to lunch, but I remind him that he is to rest for the remainder of the day. I drop him off at 12:15, confer with the ALF staff and head out.

Friday at 12:30 – I call Bob and let him know he’ll be taking me out to dinner that night. I should be totally relaxed after treating myself to a massage and a nap. He was happy to comply.

10 Comments

by Bonnie Anderson on January 22, 2013 • Permalink

Posted in Family, Stuff I Go Through

Tagged assisted living facility, club sandwich generation, epidural injection, sandwich generation

Posted by Bonnie Anderson on January 22, 2013

https://lifeonthelighterside.com/2013/01/22/at-least-the-twitching-has-passed/

The Not Too Funny but All Too True Story of How I Spent Christmas Vacation

What do Betty Crocker, Costco and my family have in common? I wouldn’t have made it through the holidays without them.

My last post was on December 11. I usually post on Tuesdays, but decided to push my Tuesday the 18th post to the 20^th to time it closer to Christmas. (This was influenced greatly by the fact that I had not written that post.) I also figured that, if you are like me, you wouldn’t be reading as many blogs over the week of Christmas, so I planned on skipping that week altogether.

Plans are made to be changed, tweaked and invaded. On the morning of the 19^th of December my plans were invaded in the form of four of my grandchildren coming to stay with us while my daughter, their mommy, was rushed to the hospital with a major gall bladder attack. If that wasn’t bad enough, she also had pancreatitis, which had to be resolved before the gall bladder could be removed.

So needless to say, life got serious. Very serious. Dena was in bad shape. Her husband stayed by her side, as my husband and I, along with our sons and daughters-in-law prayed and watched the kids. The kids, who are 9, 7, 4 and 8 months old, were wonderful, especially in light of being slightly traumatized as I picked them up and brought them to our house while they watched their mommy be rushed to the hospital.

It was a very different Christmas season. Thankfully, Dena was released from the hospital on Christmas Day and she came right to our house to nestle in our Lazy Boy and celebrate Christmas with us all. We are grateful to God. We are also amazed at the wonderful family that we have been blessed with. Our son, Scott, took off of work that first afternoon to stay with the kids so I could go to the hospital and then watched the little two the next night so Bob and I could surprise Mia and Ella (the oldest two) with a night at the theater watching The Best Christmas Pageant Ever, which we had arranged weeks beforehand. My son Joe and his wife Aubyron arrived on Friday afternoon for Christmas only to jump in with all four feet with the kids, chasing them around the yard, taking them to a movie along with Uncle Scott and helping in every way possible. My son Jesse and his wife Dacia took Bob’s dad to the hospital to see Dena as he was so worried about her, and then carted the three oldest kids to their house for an afternoon giving us a much-needed break. And that doesn’t even count the friends who prayed.

I am amazed at God’s provision. Here it was the busiest time of year and because of that very fact, my family was around. Bob had even previously scheduled vacation days the week of Christmas.

In light of all of this, our Christmas Eve dinner was a bit different. We decided to let Dena off the hook regarding preparing any dishes. After all, she was in the hospital and on a liquid diet. It just wouldn’t have been right to put that kind of pressure on her.

Between my mom, my daughters-in-law and me, not to mention a strong showing by Costco and Betty Crocker, we had it covered. Dinner consisted of a Costco spiral-cut ham, frozen yeast rolls, Betty Crocker Au Gratin potatoes (yes, right from the box), and green beans and pan roasted red onions (the one and only home-made dish). Dessert was apple pie, fresh from Costco’s bakery. We ate it all on fancy paper plates. It was delicious.

After dinner we sat around a fire and sang Christmas carols, drove around looking at lights and then returned home to put the kids to bed. We used our iPhones to face-time with Dena and her husband Derek so they could see their kids in their new Christmas pajamas. I cried. Dena cried. But we all knew she would be home soon.

As I mentioned, our prayers were answered when Dena came home on Christmas. She was still pretty weak, so she recovered at our house for the next four days. Most of that time was without her kids as they were home with their daddy allowing Dena more effective and undisturbed rest.

So this is a portion of what I’ve been up to lately. There has been no time for writing, at least no time that I have opted to use for writing. Sleeping and being with the family took priority. I hope to be back on a regular Tuesday schedule, but I can see that my life is not my own and that’s good. I make the plans; God has his way. It is very good.

Now I’m working on getting my funny bone back in shape. Maybe Costco has something that would help with that. I know my family always comes through, especially the grandkids. All I need is a little energy to write things down, and I’ll be back in the swing of things in no time. Meanwhile, I think I’ll pull out my Betty Crocker Cookbook and look for a chicken soup recipe. That’s always good for the soul.

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by Bonnie Anderson on January 11, 2013 • Permalink

Posted in Faith, Family, Holidays

Tagged Betty Crocker Au Gratin Potatoes, Costco, The Best Christmas Pageant Ever

Posted by Bonnie Anderson on January 11, 2013

https://lifeonthelighterside.com/2013/01/11/the-not-too-funny-but-all-too-true-story-of-how-i-spent-christmas-vacation/

He’s Making a List (on an Excel Spreadsheet) and Checking It Twice

It’s Christmastime again and there is no better season to be married to an engineer. He comes in so handy. This will be Bob’s and my 38^th Christmas together as husband and wife, so I know what I’m talking about.

Each year, Bob and I sit down together to form our gift giving list. In the early days of our marriage we would do this on paper. In those pre-computer days Bob wrote down everything on graph paper. This drove me crazy and may be the root of some of my problems with confined spaces. I don’t like writing in tiny boxes, and I’m a little claustrophobic. But my main problem was how do you use cursive handwriting on graph paper? The answer is – you don’t. Engineers don’t use cursive handwriting. They print everything, which is good because when they do have to write something in cursive, for example their signature, you can’t read it. Give them a piece of graph paper though and order and legibility return.

In order to keep me from having a bad attitude and possibly being placed on the Naughty List, we developed a system where I wrote everything down on regular paper. At Bob’s suggestion, we used columns – person, gift, cost, etc. I would check things off as we bought a gift and line through items after wrapping them.

This brings me to the present day. Bob now creates the bones of our gift giving list. He no longer uses graph paper. He is much more current than that. He uses an Excel Spreadsheet. The first time he attempted this new-fangled way of keeping track of things, I balked at it. I pulled out my yellow pad and begged him to let me use these things called paper and pen that had been my faithful friends since I was six years old. He relented, sort of. He kept his spread sheet and I kept my pad of paper. I was stubborn, as I am with most things that relate to learning/using the computer.

But, I discovered, this was not building unity in our marriage. It was not healthy for me to continue to resist his advances (technological or otherwise). He waited patiently until I finally caved. Now we happily use the spread sheet exclusively. I look at it as a way to spread (sheet) peace on earth and bless Bob. And, please don’t tell Bob this, it is very efficient. In case you are thinking about trying to find our list, it is disguised in his computer files under a phony name. You’ll never find it. Trust me, I can’t even find it. I know it’s there, because the computer has better memory function than I do. Again, it’s a good thing I have Bob around.

There are other ways that having an engineer around comes in handy. He easily calculates how many strings of Christmas lights we need for the outside of the house and hangs them most efficiently. This year when he put out our lighted Christmas moose with the head that goes back and forth, we were sad to discover that there were lights burned out around his mouth. All it took for them to work again was Bob taking one step toward the moose. Things fix themselves in his presence. He’s that intimidating!

My fiber optic winter scene had a tiny ice-skating figure broken off at the base. Bob went into his lab/office and concocted a bonding agent (glue) to put him back on his feet. My kids always marveled at how they would put broken toys on Bob’s desk and they would miraculously appear back in their rooms as good as new.

As a matter of fact, my granddaughters are now picking up on this. I suppose their mom has taught them well. We finished our last day of Grandmom School for the semester and for a treat I told the girls we were going to plan a surprise for Bumpa (Bob). Being the simple, non-flashy guy that he is, he had mentioned to me that he really likes the Charlie Brown Christmas Tree. The girls and I headed to CVS and bought him one and surprised him with it at his office. They wanted a tour so he took them down in the lab and showed them around. On seeing firsthand what he does, Mia exclaimed how this was the perfect job for him, seeing how he loves to make and fix things. It was so sweet.

The one thing I have on him when it comes to lists at Christmas is that I used to be a secretary and I know shorthand. So I write myself notes and ideas about what to get Bob for Christmas in that form and he can’t read it. And, even though I have a smart phone, I still pull out my trusty paper and pen to make my list for him. I’ve looked it over recently, but with two weeks to go before Christmas, I guess it’s time for me to check that one twice, too.

Musical Charlie Brown Christmas Tree