One Night in the Yukon

Bob and I discovered Corner Gas one night in the Yukon while we were on our Alaska trip last August. Sometimes you want to unwind after a grueling day touring gold mines and eating salmon, and TV was our option.  Corner Gas is a Canadian sitcom set in Saskatchewan. The residents of the town are quirky just like you would expect of a group who live in the middle of nowhere. We have yet to see an episode where there’s snow on the ground, so for sure this show is fictional.

But two of the characters rang true. Oscar and Emma are the parents of the show’s main character Brent, who is the normalish one of the group – representing a typical guy, or at least typical in the prairie of their fictional town named Dog River.

Oscar and Emma are also characters in my book DOWN AND OUT AND READY FOR A MIRACLE. It took me a few episodes to make that connection, but if you watch the show, which streams on Amazon Prime, my disclaimer is that I did not base my characters on those of the show. But there are remarkable similarities.

Their Oscar is a cranky curmudgeon of a guy who is married to Emma. She is the boss who holds the family together. That could also describe my Oscar and Emma. It’s a little freaky, but you can’t make this stuff up. Wait, that is literally what I do when I write a book, but I did not make up this odd connection.

You can check it out for yourselves. Watch Corner Gas on Amazon Prime. It may be too silly for you, but it’s right up my alley. Order my book on Amazon (see side bar), and tell me what you think?

Also, it seems Amazon is a factor in my post today. I can’t imagine life without them. They aren’t perfect, though. For some odd reason my first book became unavailable, and my publisher had to jump through many hoops to get it back online. He was successful! ALWAYS LOOK FOR THE MAGIC is available again and just in time for gift giving. It is a funny and endearing middle-grade (ages 8-12) fictional account of an 11-year-old boy in The Depression who wants to be a magician. It’s based on stories my dad told me about his life in that era. Both my books are now available.


My sweet mom is a huge support for me.

Here’s My Two Cents

A penny for your thoughts? I’m in favor of stopping production of the humble penny. After all, it costs 3.69 cents to produce one. Nowadays, if I see one on the street, I’ll probably pass it by. Since my knee surgery, it’s not worth the risk of squatting and bending despite the old rhyme, “See a penny, pick it up, and all the day you’ll have good luck.”

It is true, though, that a penny saved is a penny earned, but we no longer think along those meager lines. You need more than a plethora of pennies to make a difference in your budget. I believe even Benjamin Franklin would revise his thoughts on pennies and dollars from “Watch the pennies and the dollars will take care of themselves,” to “Watch the credit card use or you’ll go broke.” (quote from me)

I do suppose pennies from heaven is still valid if you look at them like manna from heaven. The simple penny is a metaphor for blessing (and other weird stuff which I won’t mention here). If God were to send pennies falling from heaven, I hope he would do it after we’re all asleep. If we were out and about, it would be more like a plague with people being knocked unconscious by falling pennies. It makes me think of that old TV show, WKRP in Cincinnati, when they dropped turkeys from a helicopter for a Thanksgiving promo. But I digress.

The final five pennies minted in Philadelphia have an OMEGA mark, and those five pennies are said to value between two and five million dollars. I don’t think those will be falling from heaven, more like auctioned to pay for all those pennies we’ve been losing our national shirts producing. I really don’t know, but that’s okay because you don’t come here for cutting edge coin collecting information.

Right after penny production came to a grinding halt, we visited Torchy’s Tacos, who displayed a sign on their door about a penny shortage.

Currently, there are between 250 and 300 billion pennies in circulation, so I don’t know who is hoarding them all. You might want to look in your grandparents’ seat cushions.

If you do have an abundance of pennies lying around your house, you could gather 1,250 of them and order my new book DOWN AND OUT AND READY FOR A MIRACLE. Of course, Amazon doesn’t take pennies, but you’re smart enough to figure out a way.

DOWN AND OUT AND READY FOR A MIRACLE is a humorous and inspirational story which follows Jacko, a middle-aged homeless man who forms connections with a disjointed group of senior citizens—especially the unpredictable Oscar. When some of Jacko’s questionable former associates catch up with him, he learns you’re never too old to start over again. Click picture of the book on the right column to order on Amazon.

Good Night, Eddie Haskell

If you want to understand what growing up was like for my generation, watch Leave It To Beaver, which debuted a year after I did. Then you will understand the “image” of a family from 1957 – 1963 when it aired. Ward Cleaver went to work in a suit and tie everyday. I have no idea what he did. He read the newspaper. He was full of wisdom. June stayed home, fixed the morning breakfast and coffee in the kitchen, displayed a lovely dinner in the dining room, made sure the boys bathed regularly, and took care of the house. She was undeniably a successful, wise woman and homemaker. She did all of this while wearing high heels. Her typical outfit consisted of a dress cinched at the waist and a short string of pearls around her neck. She never had a hair out of place.

Ward’s character was familiar to me. He mirrored my dad. But my mom saved the dress and pearls for church or a special occasion. June was only a vision of what a housewife was. (more…)

Whatcha doing?

That’s my question of the day: What are you doing?

There are many ways to answer. Sometimes a short answer is easy – cleaning, working, etc. We can also be painfully honest with all the details, which most people really don’t want to hear, or go the other extreme and say – nothing.

Sometimes nothing is exactly what we need to do, but how do you do it? And, how do you do it well?

Maybe nothing could really mean that you’re …

recharging

resting

meditating

praying

thinking

slowing yourself down

All of these things are essential. When was the last time you took the time to do nothing? It can be very beneficial. I don’t want to brag or anything, but I’m getting better and better at doing nothing. I may start teaching classes on it.

What are you doing when you say you’re doing nothing?

 

Boom, There It is (x 3)

Sometimes forgetting something is the best, and so it was the night of June 24. SpaceX was due to launch another of its Falcon Heavy Rockets at 11:30 PM. More accurately, that was when the launch window would open. Launch windows are tricky and no two seem to be alike. Sometimes there is no window, they must launch exactly at that moment or wait until another day. That is rare, though, usually they have a span of a couple of hours.

I don’t live on the Space Coast. I live 45.24 miles from the Kennedy Space Center as the crow flies (thanks, Alexa). Our living room faces east, so I only have to step outside and I can see the rocket’s red and yellow glare above the tree line seconds after lift-off. It’s a great view and if a launch gets scrubbed, I just go back inside.

No photo description available.

Photo Credit: Fox35 WOFL

I really wanted to watch the June 24 launch. It has been unbelievably hot down here but the humidity hasn’t been too bad, so clear skies were expected. But I forgot all about it and was asleep before 11. At approximately 2:45 AM, Bob and I were jolted awake by the familiar sonic booms – only unlike the space shuttle’s double booms, this time there were three.

falcon heavy launch

Photo Credit: NASA/Joel Kowsky

I jumped out of bed and ran to the front door as Bob reminded me that, by the time we hear the booms, the event is over. Not to be deterred and also not fully awake, I maneuvered through the dark (why didn’t I turn on a light?) and beheld a great view of a very dark sky.

At this point I was fully awake and experienced a mixed bag of thankfulness and regret that I didn’t stay up waiting for the 2:30 AM launch as several of our friends did. After all, some of us (Bob) have to work the next day, and that is precisely why I didn’t engage Bob in conversation as we tried to get back to sleep.

My obstacle was that the house was making weird, creaking noises, which I verified with Bob before I let him off the hook of getting to the why of those noises. I’m nice like that. Why are house sounds so loud in the still of the night?

We live in a 35-year-old wood-frame house. I have noticed it creaks more than our former block home did. This is especially evident on colder nights, but this wasn’t a cold night – far from it. Perhaps some dynamic process is at work changing our house by degrees. I’m assuming that kind of dynamic is thermal.

Real-Life Men Of Science Who Made

Real Scientists Who’ve Been on The Big Bang Theory, Photo Credit: http://www.cbs.com/shows/big_bang_theory/photos/page/9/

All I’ve learned about thermal dynamics could be contained in a very tiny book. I’ve picked up a few things by osmosis because my hubby is a mechanical engineer and also because I like to watch The Big Bang Theory. It’s a very educational show. Or is it? If you don’t know for sure, then it could be classified as Schrodinger’s TV show. It could be a good show or a bad one, but until you turn it on and see for yourself, it must be classified as both – or neither. (I learned all about Schrodinger’s Cat from the Big Bang Theory. It has proved to be valuable information. Or has it?)

You can now understand how kind and merciful I was to my husband by not starting up this type of conversation with him at 3 o’clock in the morning. After dinner, no such mercy was extended. We had a stimulating conversation about whether or not the sonic booms from the 2 side boosters and the center core booster, which crashed, could have been responsible for the increase in creakiness of our house that night.

I wondered if sound waves could have gone out in concentric circles and had an effect on our house. Could this be related to the sonic booms? Also, the more we talked about it, the more my mind wandered to Sonic Drive-In Restaurants, even though I have never been to one. I kind of got in the mood for a milkshake but it was too late so I settled for a dish of ice cream and an episode of The Big Bang Theory. Bob, tired from the night before, just went to bed.

These are the Days of Our Lives

Like sand through an hourglass

“I WILL NOT BE WATCHING SOAP OPERAS – unless for comic relief.”

This is a quote from my dear and funny friend, Pam. One fine day, she made the mistake of leaving the room while watching the news at noon and when she came back through, the soaps were on.

Here’s a peek at our texting conversation.

Pam: I stopped for a moment to see what I was watching. Excellent acting, by the way – NOT!!! I cracked up laughing and changed the channel. I felt like I was in Another World.

Me: You weren’t in Another World, these are simply The Days of our Lives. Think about it, we used to be the Young and the Restless. Now we’re the Bold and the Beautiful. We’re older and wiser.

Pam: Look, right now I feel like I am in A Secret Storm and it’s not yet The Edge of Night. But, As the World Turns, so does my life.

Me: True. And you only have One Life to Live. At least that’s what I tell All My Children.

Somehow, in the midst of this deep conversation Pam and I had forgotten this was a group text. That is, until another voice was heard: You are casting Dark Shadows over our text stream.

Alas, we were. Such is the danger of group text.

Side note: Do you remember Dark Shadows? Pam’s mom wouldn’t allow her to watch it. Since I was allowed, we are now afraid that our childhood selves could never have been friends. It’s so sad to see a friendship between people who didn’t yet know each other be thwarted by a television show!

Survivor Finale – Spoiler Alert!!!

Image result for free pictures of jeff probst

Photo Source: tvseriesfinale.com

Sacred TV time. That statement is wrong on so many levels, except that is how I “view” my Survivor television watching. Survivor is my absolute favorite TV show. My kids know this. Some of them watch the show, too; so last Wednesday night when Bob and I sat down to watch the finale an hour and fifteen minutes after the scheduled time, I texted my kids to let them know we were just then starting. I couldn’t risk a kink in my plan to find out who the sole survivor would be from watching the show, not from my kids lack of knowledge that we were watching delayed. (more…)

The Crown, Alexa, and Marital Disagreement

We’ve been watching the Netflix series, The Crown, so I am typing this with a British accent. I also am drinking tea. When someone comes in the room, I give a royal wave; but I don’t speak with commoners while in the writing mode. This is all to put me in the proper state of  mind to tell my story.

This series has brought up a serious difference of opinion between Bob and me. After over four decades of marriage, you’d think this sort of thing would roll off of me. (more…)

A Pick-up Line in a Pick-up Line?

Pick-up Line

Bob and I were waiting at Subway (the sandwich shop not the mass transit system), trying to figure out what delectable delight we’d feast on for lunch. From across the not-so-crowded room, I saw him. His back was to me. Without hesitation, I walked right up to him, tapped him on the shoulder, and asked, “What are you doing tonight?”

Think me brazen if you will, but I had to know.

I stood there gazing up at this tall, young man, who was easily young enough to be my son, waiting for my answer. What was he going to do tonight?

He smiled and replied, “The same thing I do every night – try to take over the world.”

Well, that made my day. You see, I am a huge fan of Steven Spielberg. You may have heard of him. I understand he has produced numerous, notable films. But if you have not had the pleasure of viewing his animated TV series, Pinky and The Brain, while sitting next to your child or grandchild, you are clearly missing out on some serious fun.

I spent many hours watching with my kids. Brain is a genius mouse who is set on taking over the world, and Pinky is his insane sidekick (according to the catchy theme song and obvious to all who view). Every day Pinky asks Brain what they are going to do tonight. Every day Brain replies, “The same thing we do every night, Pinky. Try to take over the world.”

Just the thought of Pinky driving Brain crazy makes me smile. The thought of watching with my kids does, too. And, that day in Subway, I smiled as I engaged with a fellow fan and thought that if we all tried to take over the world with fun, love, and kindness, that would really be something amazing. Pinky would love it!

“The Wheel”

We used to watch Wheel of Fortune and Jeopardy on a regular basis. That was before cable TV, Netflix, and the realization that these shows were geared toward senior citizens. Truthfully, the shows are really great for any age (especially when students are on Jeopardy, which gives the vast majority of us a fighting chance). It is the advertising on them that reveals their target audience. Now, with the DVR, we don’t need to watch and see if the lady who has fallen will in fact be helped up. (Spoiler: She will be.)

Last Saturday, Bob and I gathered at my parents’ house along with my brother, my sister, and her family. The clocked chimed seven, and we sat down to watch Jeopardy and The Wheel.

My dad is blind, but my mom calls the play-by-play for him during Wheel of Fortune. It is challenging for him, a man who was always involved in everything going on around him, to sit and interact in this manner. But to his credit, he does.

Let’s ramp up that challenge by acknowledging that Dad has a huge hearing loss. With his hearing aids, he can converse, but a lot of chit-chat and our yelling out answers at the TV makes it hard on him. With the rest of us engaged in being the first one to get the answer, we hardly notice their challenge.

The puzzle was “Found in the Kitchen.” It had two words.

__ __ __ __ __ __ __ __

__ __ __ __ __ __ __ __ __ __

Got it yet?

The letters started to fill in a few at a time.

_ O O _ _ O O _

_ O L L _ _ T I O N

Mom kept Dad informed. Dad, who can’t see the television much less what is displayed on it, who can barely hear, who has trouble with a lot of noise, softly said, “Cookbook Collection.”

We all went crazy. The blind man solved it before the five sighted adults in the room did. My sister asked if somebody whispered the answer to him, but we aren’t that kind of family, plus he would have never heard us! We are fiercely competitive, and we also would never insult our father by giving an answer to him.

This still has me shaking my head. Maybe Mom and Dad are using some of the products advertised on the show. Maybe they are onto something that keeps their brains sharp. Maybe I should be a regular watcher (not a joke about being regular). For now, I will just shake my head and smile when I think about what a great team my mom and dad are. I guess after 69 years of marriage, the two really do become one.

Mom & Dad celebrating their 65th anniversary,                                 4 years ago