A Period of Hostility

According to Hannah Frishberg, I became cool when periods were no longer a part of my life. That’s right – it’s cool to be postmenopausal. No more messing with those pesky periods (though I refuse to omit one here).

You may rightly wonder what I’m talking about; sometimes I do, too. This should clear things up. I read an article in the New York Post (online edition), by Hannah Frishberg. It’s about that little dot at the end of a sentence, the innocent little period, and is titled, “Young People Don’t Trust Anyone Who Uses this Punctuation Mark.” It brought me to a full stop. Seriously?

You. Have. To. Be. Kidding. Me.

This is going to be the thing that divides us?

Hannah is touting her views on texting and the use of this end-all punctuation. She claims that periods come across as “overly hostile and, worse yet, extremely uncool.”

WHO ARE CALLING HOSTILE, HANNAH? 

I thought back on the days of my life (not the soap opera) – days that included periods of youth, marriage, child-bearing, child-rearing, and empty nest. And these days were marked with periods of joy, laughter, fear, anger, peace, confusion, sorrow, searching, exhaustion, sickness, health, resting, faith, and contentment. These are the things that punctuate life; and by cracky, I’m going to use proper punctuation when I write about them. PERIOD!

I do remember being slightly hostile when on my period, but that was normal. It was nothing that a Snickers couldn’t handle. This article, though, has brought up some grammatical hostility in me, but since I’m dieting right now I can’t appease it with a Snickers. Sigh.

Stop the madness!

Honestly, I do understand what she’s talking about; it’s the extremism toward punctuation that gives me pause. If I answer a text with a yes or a no, I don’t put a period behind it. It’s not necessary. Hannah quotes Victoria Turk, who claims in her digital etiquette book that, “Only old people or troubled souls put periods at the end of every sentence.” I had no idea that the simple little period revealed so much about its user. It makes me want to send her a text right now that is full of periods. Who is troubled now, Victoria?

I suppose the exclamation point is downright violent!

Side note: In the old days of texting, you had to pay extra for it. As it became common place, my husband led the resistance to texting. He argued that people had worked hard to go from the development of Morse Code being tapped out on connected lines to actually being able to talk to people over land lines to carrying a phone in our pockets. Why would we want to take a step back? Now, of course, he’s a convert; but he had a point. Hearing someone’s voice is sweet, but texting is efficient.

In doing my due diligence for this post, I came across this quote from Matthew McConaughey that might sum things up:

“Life is a series of commas, not periods.”

He ended it with a period, so there you go. Our life may be viewed as one long run-on sentence, but it is best appreciated when broken up by proper punctuation.

 

Danger in Central Florida!

Wild animals and poor spellers are everywhere. Be on alert!

Now that I have your attention, let me highlight some of the stuff we Floridians have to put up with that is going way beyond reptiles and sharks. I’ve mentioned before (for those of you who don’t live here) that we essentially live in a subtropical swamp. Therefore, it’s often humid and hot. Really hot, accompanied by alligators, snakes, and mosquitoes. But that only lasts for six months, after which we return to just plain hot with occasional warm spells and alligators, snakes, and mosquitoes. (more…)

The Importance of Good Grammar and Coffee

Happy National Grammar Day!  I love that this day falls on the fourth day of March.  I always told my kids that this is the most active day of the year – march forth (I’ve taken liberty with my forth/fourth spellings).

In honor of this, my post today will contain some (oh the horror) grammatical errors.  It’s up to you to find them, fair reader, as you read this true story of my pursuit of a cup of coffee.  Please report your findings in the comment section of my blog.  Let’s see how good you are.  I believe there are four to seven errors.  Three are totally unacceptable and the others are lesser offenses or perhaps matters of preference.  I also realize that it is entirely possible that there might be other errors that I have not discovered.  If you point out any of these, I will most likely give the impression that I made them on purpose.  I’m the writer, so that’s my privilege.

I love having monkeys and butterflies on my coffee package.

I love having monkeys and butterflies on my coffee package.

Today as I write this post, I am sitting here drinking a cup of organic, shade-grown coffee from Costa Rica, which a friend of mine brought back for me from her recent trip.  It is perhaps the most challenging cup of coffee that I have ever had the privilege to take a drink of.

It all started back around the first of the year.  I had just cracked open a three pound bag of coffee from Costco days before Cindi gave me my present.  Being the slightly anal person that I am, I decided to wait until that bag was exhausted before opening the new one.

That day finally arrived on Saturday.  I was more than excited as I prepared to make myself a cup of the exquisite new brew.  After a long, tiring day, I was ready for my afternoon coffee fix. The only thing standing between me and that delight was the unknown location of my coffee grinder.  I didn’t leave a drawer unopened or a cabinet unrifled through.  It was nowhere to be found.

Later that night, we popped into Target to get a pound of coffee just in case my grinder still proved to be eluding me.  I grabbed a pound (or I should say 12 ounces, since a pound package seems to be obsolete) and we headed home.

My sweet husband was putting the coffee away for me and suddenly stopped, held up the package and asked me, “What’s this?”

Even in my tired, coffee deprived state, I knew the answer – coffee.  But he kept asking so I read the label, “Dunkin Donuts Original Blend WHOLE BEAN Coffee!  Nooooooo!!!”

But it was true.  I bought a bunch of beans.  I considered throwing them out the window to see if they would turn into a coffee beanstalk over night.  Then I could send Bob up the stalk to fetch me some coffee, but I would still have to grind it, so that wouldn’t work.  Instead I frantically called my neighbor.  Melodye understands the importance of coffee and even had an extra grinder.

So now you know how I outsmarted my coffee grinder and am now drinking a delicious cup or organic, shade-grown, Costa Rican coffee.  Thank you Cindi and Melodye.